“Death brings out the worst in people” she said as she wandered past. “Makes them kind of ‘stiff’?” I quipped, muttering it softly to myself so as not to cause offence. I wondered what kind of story went along with a comment like that and chided myself for my flippancy and lack of understanding. No doubt she meant that death brought out the worst in other people (herself?), not the poor, unfortunate deceased who no longer had anything to worry about.
“What brings out the best, then?” I wondered, turning the chance comment around and pausing awhile to ponder on it. Sometimes it seems like adversity brings out the best in us – or so people say. In times of war, financial hardship, natural disasters and sickness people rally round and help each other. When someone is diagnosed with a terminal illness or a loved one is suffering, we are brought up short and start sifting through our lives, trying to discard the trivialities and focus on the things, and especially the people, that are special to us.
But what about those minor irritations? Do they bring out the best? Not in me, certainly… Under pressure, I get grumpy. When arrangements fail to work out, when the weather spoils my plans, when I can’t sleep or my favourite sweater shrinks in the wash after I only wore it once, I get grumpy!
In common with a lot of people, I’m at my best when the sun shines, when my neighbours smile at me, when I have a great holiday to look forward to or when someone tells me “I love you!” A lot of things bring out the worst in people – death is the ultimate hurdle. Too late to worry at that point! So let’s try and bring out the best – in ourselves and in each other.
We all need what our American friends call ‘warm fuzzies’ – a wonderfully evocative phrase. Teddy bears are great when you are five years old but, sadly, most of us need more sophisticated warm fuzzies when we get older, although I’m still a great believer in teddy bears! So, why not smile at a stranger today and make their day? Dream about your next sun-drenched holiday, even if it is a long time coming, or, tell someone “I love you!” However, if all else fails, treat yourself to a new bear. They’re very understanding, listen very patiently and never disagree.
“What brings out the best, then?” I wondered, turning the chance comment around and pausing awhile to ponder on it. Sometimes it seems like adversity brings out the best in us – or so people say. In times of war, financial hardship, natural disasters and sickness people rally round and help each other. When someone is diagnosed with a terminal illness or a loved one is suffering, we are brought up short and start sifting through our lives, trying to discard the trivialities and focus on the things, and especially the people, that are special to us.
But what about those minor irritations? Do they bring out the best? Not in me, certainly… Under pressure, I get grumpy. When arrangements fail to work out, when the weather spoils my plans, when I can’t sleep or my favourite sweater shrinks in the wash after I only wore it once, I get grumpy!
In common with a lot of people, I’m at my best when the sun shines, when my neighbours smile at me, when I have a great holiday to look forward to or when someone tells me “I love you!” A lot of things bring out the worst in people – death is the ultimate hurdle. Too late to worry at that point! So let’s try and bring out the best – in ourselves and in each other.
We all need what our American friends call ‘warm fuzzies’ – a wonderfully evocative phrase. Teddy bears are great when you are five years old but, sadly, most of us need more sophisticated warm fuzzies when we get older, although I’m still a great believer in teddy bears! So, why not smile at a stranger today and make their day? Dream about your next sun-drenched holiday, even if it is a long time coming, or, tell someone “I love you!” However, if all else fails, treat yourself to a new bear. They’re very understanding, listen very patiently and never disagree.
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